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the Obsession Chronicles

the sun coming out

inspiration striking

somewhere among the grey days this winter i stopped taking pictures * so much so that i stopped carrying my digi around with me everywhere i went * well, i'm back! in 3 days i've taken over 250 photos & i haven't gone out yet today...

it's funny how it comes & goes like that * i try to just let it flow & let it slow as the universe directs but it sure feels good when it starts up again! last Tuesday out on the headlands was one of those days when it just really feels like i'm in exactly the right place & enjoying exactly the right time * i'm lucky enough to feel like that most of my life (it's all about the attitude) but i hadn't felt quite so right since the night we camped below Turks Head * i saw all kinds of pictures all over the headlands & for the first time in weeks wished i had my camera with me * when my feet hit the wet sand down at the beach i laughed out loud... this is it!

the next day i took just under 150 photos (love that digi) * some of them are even good (see the whole show at tyV) *

cell phone free zone

odds are, i live in a different world than you do * i live in a different world than many of my friends do * i have had very close friends, gentle sweet people, ask questions that feel rude to me, like "what do you do for fun? drive into town?" i'm tempted to say, "o no, there's nothing fun within 50 miles of here * if i want fun i have to go to the city, of course" * most people think fun involves traffic & cell phones *

i've had strong independent friends tell me, after a single day alone in the house, "i couldn't do your job" -- as in work at home, alone * i don't really think of myself as strong & independent... i'm like that adorable pathetic Paul Giamatti at the Independent Spirit Awards: "i'm neither independent nor spirited" *

mine is a different world * i certainly don't live in it alone but it's not the one that even my way more open than that non-exisitant "normal" friends consider "normal" * they say things that surprise me, sometimes hurt my feelings, without even thinking about it * not that i think before i speak alla time... some of the things they say make it sound like they feel that their world is better, easier, more fun or even more worthwhile than mine is & i know they would never say that that's true * sometimes i wonder, not that i hold it against them... i'm just saying... & hopefully they won't hold it agains me if they think they know who they are because i'm talking about some of my very closest friends here *

everybody thinks her own choices are the best ones, at least i hope so, but mine are only best for me (& so on) * they may only be best for now, or best out of the available options * maybe nobody can really see into another person's world * i know it's taken me a long time even to start to understand my own!

i'm working on it... & maybe those friends who do read this will give it a little more thought too *

take me to the river

Canyonlands, i toldja i'd be back! i made my plans with the kind & amusing brothers V to return to the gorgeous muddy quiet Green River again in September * sigh... i'm already there *